Posted by Matt Moore
Well, he did it. LeBron James actually made a cartoon based on the famous series of commercials showing the different sides of himself. It's an actual cartoon with actual animation and everything. The show opens with a rudimentary rap after an introduction from King James, then has a storyline which features a talking dog trying to eat Kid LeBron, before they run into Business LeBron's house, which apparently is modeled after "The Ladies' Man" and then they go buy a talking lion to eat the talking dog, but realize that would be wrong so they stop, the end.
Look, it's a cartoon with executive producers LeBron James and Maverick Carter. If you were hoping for a Pixar-quality script, you came to the wrong place. Here's episode No. 1 :
A few notes:
- The show is based in Akron, so at least it has a semblance of reality to it, even if I'm pretty sure the pristine suburban neighborhoods don't accurately reflect LeBron's childhood, from accounts. I'm sure Clevelanders will be thrilled with him holding his roots up in animated form. It does show he hasn't completely abandoned the state of Ohio, just as he said it wouldn't.
- The only character James voices in the show is "Business LeBron." Why am I not surprised?
- The funniest character, "Wise", appears for about five seconds and has what is really the only funny line of the show.
- The writers missed a golden opportunity to sneak a jab at Paul Pierce with a Rottweiler joke here.
- The next episode, which features corporate-sponsored technology, has a Chinese foreign-exhange student. James is literally finding the marketing elements he wants to incorporate, then building a show around it.
- The lion element is probably a parable for something, but given he wears a smoking jacket and elects not to make the cold-blooded kill because "Business" tells him not to, I'm not sure we want to chase that one down the rabbit hole.
- The scene with the Lion and the Dog in the basement is straight out of either "Pulp Fiction" or "Reservoir Dogs," I can't figure out which.